A Craving, just like an addiction.
However my craving is popping up in most people.
That is the craving for Love, affection and attention and company.
However I have all my life been alone, sure I’ve had many relatives and friends and nothing’s changed but I am compelled by seeing how a partner in crime can heal broken and suffering souls.
I once had different feeling, fire in the belly and heart, for someone I’ve never considered as a would be partner but hey..
Just by seeing her I would feel great and a motivation that I haven’t felt ever since… Seriously had she been a confidant or a close friend or even an acquaintance I would have been so much richer and not just monetary wealth but wealth of the mind heart and soul.
I don’t want to say that she would be a girlfriend because she’s preoccupied with something else.
The reason for this craving is that I have been bombarded with dating and marriage apps and Bollywood movies about how Love prevailing in the heart of even the most lonesome.
Its affecting me very much…Not to mention that a person gave me a ventines card at the age of 14 and coming from a culture that pride’s itself on arranged marriage and most certainly no love or especially teenage love.
Also my dad was a dick back then, nothing has changed since, and I had to throw away the card without reading it because had i taken it home I would’ve been stabbed and or beaten, all by the guy who beat me up at the age of 17 for shaving my mustache off.
At the same time I wouldn’t want to always be with that proposed person because Ive been married and I know how messy a relationship can be and how demanding as well as a drain on the mind and body.